Loved One technicians hurriedly scrambled about the set, making final adjustments to the cameras and scenery. Just back behind the curtain, Barry Clements lay under heavy sedation. Dr. Copernicus wringed his hands together in anxious glee. Taping would begin in five minutes.
It had now been six months since the Doctor had taken the impressionable school teacher in, and after various operations and therapy sessions, it seemed that Barry's transformation into the Purple Dinosaur of Love was complete.
When Dr. Copernicus thought about it, the entire process was amazing. When introducing Barney-DNA into a human host, it was virtually passive at first. But as time went on, the Barney-DNA began to gradually assimilate itself into every major component of the human host, steadily “conquering” the host’s own DNA and mutating at an alarming rate. The Barney-DNA was by definition, a parasitic agent of an extremely agressive nature.
Not that Barry knew it. The sedatives and front lobal implants kept him barely coherent of his condition. His once thin and muscular body had been mutated into a fat, plush, purple abomination. Mass graftings of fatty tissue had insured that part of the transformation. For the head, tail, and appendages, the brilliantly diabolical Dr. Copernicus grafted mass sections of Barry’s body, cross-etching the fragmented DNA molecules of the Purple Beast himself. Endless hours of intensive therapy sessions involving Barney videos had completed the mental processes. The final assessment and treatment was finished just last week.
When Barry lifted his plush arms upward and bellowed "That's stuuuuuppppendous!" from the operating table, Dr. Copernicus and the assistants shrieked in delight. Calls were made, technicians pulled out of their beds at unseemly hours to begin studio preparations. The Church of Purple Love performed a three-day mass, ending with Barry's baptism. Chalice upon chalice of sacharrine-saturated water was poured over his head, while he clasped his paws and chuckled in embarassment. While those of the outside world carried about their daily routine, a new age of Barneyism was on the rise, again.
The only person who did not take part in the celebration was Dr. Krupper, who sat back in bemused silence while the worshippers lavished praise upon Dr. Copernicus and his Barry-turned-Barney creation. If anyone were to watch Dr. Krupper carefully, they would see an occasional smirk cross his aging, portly face.
With Barry Clement's transformation complete, it was time to renew the studio equipment that had lain so neglected for so many years. By the end of the day the "Barney and Friends" studio set had been faithfully replicated, and Loved One musicians tuned and polished their instruments. Many members of the Church of Purple Love had volunteered their children to appear for the historic first episode which would be taped once the studio had been secured. Children of all ages fidgeted and squirmed, anxious to get on the air with the All-Loving Purple Plushosaurus.
And now that moment had arrived.
Dr. Copernicus injected a stimulant into Barry/Barney's temple. The creature gave a short cry, then groaned softly. Merrick, who had appointed himself as the director, approached Barry. As the stimulant kicked in, Merrick looked into his eyes while Dr. Copernicus restrained the dino-mutant's thick arms. "You are no longer Barry Clements," began Merrick, talking in a slow, dreamy voice. "From this moment on, Barry Clements no longer exists, not in memory, not ever. All that exists now is you. You are Barney. You will be Barney....forever."
The Copernicus-Barney nodded his head drearily, as saliva seeped down his chin. He smiled stupidly and followed the two men out onto the set. The studio lights were blinding and set crews were taping down the last few set pieces. A group of twenty children all huddled and smiled at him as he took his place. The two men left him there, and prepared to cue the music. From a dark corner, Dr. Krupper looked on, grinning.
Suddenly the lights flashed on and the Loved Ones kicked into the music. The children gleefully danced in a circle, and sang:
Barney is a dinosaur, he lives in our imagination,
He's really what you might just call, a dinosaur sensation!
As the children sang, Copernicus-Barney staggered into the circle, waving and smiling, wagging his implanted tail to the music. So many children....such thrilling music....he was feeling happy.
Wasn’t he?
Parents of the dancing children, among other members of the Purple Love congregation, watched in mindless glee, tears of joy streaming down their faces. Barney was back. Jeremy Phillips was defeated once again. The world would come to know Barney the Dinosaur once again. Or else.
The music ended. The audience cheered. The children giggled and hugged "Barney". Dr. Krupper made his way out of the studio. The purple human-dinosaur began to feel strange. Very strange.
It wasn't until a moment later when Copernicus-Barney bit off a toddler's arm that the blissfulness of the moment descended into an abyss of deep-rooted horror. As blood sprayed against the walls of the studio, children and adults alike fled in terror, while Loved One technicians and musicians scrambled to subdue the deranged dinosaur. “Barney" fought on, plowing one of his thick arms through a Loved One's chest, waving it about like a chunk of meat on a skewer. Several humans scrambled for their rifles, but Dr. Copernicus pleaded with them not to. Instead, he made a daring leap at his hellish creation, plunging a tranquilizer directly into Copernicus-Barney’s thigh. The mindless beast roared, and flung the doctor across the set. The doctor's body toppled over set pieces, shattering glass and wood, increasing the panic.
"I love you!!" shrieked the monster, wresting a Loved One's head off of its shoulders. When the lifeless head only gaped and sagged in his hands, the Plush Purple Beast flung it against the wall, shattering it like a pumpkin. "Won't you say you love me too!?!?" it cried, then slowly sagged to the ground amidst the bloody carnage.
Dr. Copernicus knelt down beside the Copernicus-Barney and shook his head in great frustration. "Why? Why?" muttered the stunned doctor.
"Why indeed?" chirped a low, moronic voice from behind Dr. Copernicus. The Doctor turned and stared at a tall, stocky, purple figure with a fat green belly and idiotic grin. Beside him stood the triumphant figure of Dr. Krupper, who had his arm wrapped firmly around the creature.
"Perhaps this," said Dr. Krupper, "is what you were trying to create my good doctor?"